Because I was starting over, I was limited financially and my ability to make money was lost. The mind cannot think properly when under pure stress. I found a lawyer out of Salt Lake City who charged me a small amount to take my criminal case. At the same time, I hired a lawyer out of Nevada to fight my custody case.

In this post, I’m going to focus on the Salt Lake City lawyer and the criminal charges. Despite having a clean record and no history of violence or alcoholism, which were the main claims of the opposing party, I was offered what I feel is a horrible plea deal.

I was being charged with (1) assault, (2) domestic violence in the presence of a minor, (3) possession of marijuana, and (4) possession of paraphernalia. Additionally, remember I told you all that my ex placed a restraining order on me against him and our child? I broke this order and called him on her first birthday, hoping to FaceTime with her. Instead, he waited until a couple of days before Christmas to report me for breaking the order. His intention, my Utah lawyer told me, was to place me in jail on Christmas. What kind of person who swore they once loved you would want you to spend any holiday in jail and not allow you to talk to your own daughter? I digress.

Back to the charges, I believe I should’ve been given community service, which I already do out of the goodness of my heart. Instead, I was offered a plea deal of pleading no contest to assault, one violation of breaking a no-contact order, 30 hours of community service, an anger assessment, a psychological assessment, and a year of probation.

I started with the community service because I love serving my community. Prior to this incident, I had started my own unofficial nonprofit, which I will discuss more in another blog. As I was already privy to volunteering, I knew the organizations I wanted to go to. I didn’t want to just volunteer at one place; as an aspiring nonprofit organizer, I wanted to learn from a few of them.

The Cupcake Girls is a non-profit that provides non-judgmental support and resources to individuals in the adult industry and those affected by sex trafficking. This aligns perfectly with my mission to empower and uplift women who have faced similar struggles and judgments as I have. While pursuing my second degree, I volunteered with them, making it the first organization I chose to work with.

Next, I found what would become my favorite charitable gangsters to volunteer with – Just One Project. They captured my attention quickly because they feed the homeless. Having just escaped the heels of homelessness, I thought, “Sign me up.” Because it was court-appointed and one of my charges was assault, the director, Erin, had to interview me before I could start and review my court documents. They don’t want a murderer volunteering for them, right? They also work with teens and the elderly, so they wanted to ensure I was stable. Anyways, when Erin greeted me and read my paperwork, you could tell she was taken aback. These court documents didn’t match the petite frame in front of her. Reading her thoughts, I said, “I know I don’t spark any fear in your heart, huh?” She laughed and said, “None at all.” I told her my situation, and she allowed me to volunteer.

Volunteering for Just One Project, was a wonderful and eye-opening experience for me. I noticed all their sponsors plastered on the walls; they had so many. I thought, “This could be Parents Coming Together one day.” I’m not the best at working with others, but they taught me the value of having a team. I had always avoided team projects, preferring to do things myself. Lastly, I learned that what I previously thought was lacking in Las Vegas—a place that offers free food, and not just any food, but food I would actually eat myself—was all that and more at Just One.

I’m the most resourceful person that I know. Starting over, I sought resources. The Women’s Center of Las Vegas was amazing in my rebirth. They’re a center here in Vegas that supports women in various ways. Just like with the Just One Project, here was a resource that was so needed in Las Vegas that I didn’t even know existed. They allowed me to shop for anything I wanted in their warehouse. Usually, I think you’re allowed five of each item—five pairs of shorts, five pairs of shoes, etc. Originally, I had someone who was following the rules as they should. But then out of nowhere, a woman who worked there saw me and allowed me to pick out whatever I wanted. When I tell you I didn’t even have toys for my baby before coming here, I mean it. I left with a car full of toddler clothes, books, toiletries, toys, and a very cool car which my daughter still drives to this day. You are an invaluable resource here in Las Vegas. As a mother who started over, I appreciate you greatly for existing at all!

Safe Nest is a nonprofit organization dedicated to helping domestic violence survivors like myself. They provided me with an anger and psychological assessment completely free of charge, while other places were charging over $350 for just one assessment. I am incredibly grateful to Safe Nest for their support and invaluable assistance.